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The Name Dilemma

Dear Asian Youth,

For a lot of us, the seemingly simple task of introducing ourselves can come with a unique form of stress. Saying your name is not something that should be so difficult, but when said name is perceived as “foreign” or “weird”, it becomes hard not to feel like an outcast. Having a traditionally Asian name but living in a western community will more often than not lead to mispronunciations, or a desire to change the pronunciation to make it less confusing for peers.

Having your name constantly mispronounced or having to deal with an onslaught of insensitive questions may seem like a simple annoyance, but this soft bigotry can have lasting effects on the name’s bearer. For many, their name is a direct connection to their identity. The belittlement of one’s name can feel like a direct attack on the person themself. An individual’s relationship with their own name is deeply personal and can go hand-in-hand with their own feelings of self-worth.

For many individuals, they settle for mispronunciation to avoid the awkward nature of correcting someone. Sometimes, it feels as though the socially acceptable time limit to correct someone has passed. Other times, it can feel pointless and unimportant to bring it up. These flickers of doubt can prevent an individual from pushing for the respect their name deserves. If a person chooses a nickname or a different pronunciation on their own accord, then that decision should be respected. If a person feels pressured to fit in by compromising the integrity of their name, however, this is something that must change.


Unfortunately, along with the mental stress, having an ethnic-sounding name can also lead to societal barriers. In 2017, a study conducted by researchers at the University of Toronto and Ryerson University showed that even with the same qualifications, individuals with an Asian name were 28% less likely to get called back for a job interview. A 2016 study done in the United States and published in the Administrative Science Quarterly Journal, showed that if Asian Americans changed their name on a job application, they were almost twice as likely to actually receive a callback. Students with Asian names are also targets of racist pranks and subjected to teasing based on having an “unusual” name. It is clear that in these western societies, the rate of globalization does not equate to actual progression in the societal treatment of marginalized communities.


For many, compromising the pronunciation or wholly changing their name, comes from a place of fear. Julie Park, a professor of Asian American Studies at the University of Maryland, describes the two motivations for an individual to change their name as being assimilation and accommodation. Both the desire to fit in and the desire to accommodate the mainstream society can prompt people to pick and choose when to fight their battles, or just give up. It is strenuous to deliberate over the simple task of saying your name, trying to figure out where you will draw the line and if you will become a target for discrimination. While these aspects of our society will not quickly change, it is important to advocate for yourself and your name when you can. For peers and fellow community members, you have a role in respecting those individuals that have names that differ from what you are used to. By asking someone how to say their name if you’ve forgotten rather than guessing, or making the effort to use someone’s real name rather than an easily pronounceable version, your simple tasks can make a vast difference in a person’s experience.


With a new school year comes the opportunity for more introductions. When introducing yourself to new people this year, remember that no one should have to feel ashamed of their name. Having a name that is considered atypical by western standards, does not make that name any less beautiful or deserving of respect. If you have an ethnic name and want to go by that name, do not be afraid to stand firm and unwavering in your desire for it to be pronounced correctly. Your name is a part of you— do not let society pressure you to change it.



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